It's been a while ...

So I have y wrote in a while because my computer has been broken. But this one is going to be extra special. So there is only about 2 weeks left until we've been together for a year and this year has been the best yer of my entire life. I have never had someone who is so wonderful and so honest! I love you with all my heart Justin Voth and I am going to marry you my baby! You are so wonderful to me  ! You are my one and only love that will ever be. I promise you with all my heart ❤ 

i am so crazy inlove with my boyfriend right now its insane. everything he does all the little things mean so much to me. idk where i'd be without him. your the love of my life and always will be ♥

things i wanna do with you !

This is my list of things i want to do with you: These are the second round of the 33 things i love about you and want to do with you :)

1. Shower with you ;) 
2. Sleep in your arms every night
3. Have sex for a full day. non stop 
4. go hunting with you 
5. take a long ride down a back road and sleep under the stars 
6. tent out in the woods near my house
7. go hot tubbing 
8. have you plan a date day! 
9. give you a full body massage 
10.  go see a concert with you 
11. go to the meuseum 
12. go sky diving 
13. have a picnic 
14. stare passionatley into each others eyes and just say things we love about each other for hours 
15. kiss for 10 minutes straight
16. HAVE A FAMILY ♥
17. move into our own house 
18. make you diner everynight 
19. play tennis 
20. kiss in the rain 
21. carve our initials into a tree 
22. make a scrapbook
23. role play ;) 
24. give each other ring pop rings just like inn norbit :)
25. go on vacation together 
26. watch clouds and the sunset 
27. prank call people 
28. get drunk together 
29. bring me to grad so i can dress fancy for you the one time before our wedding 
30. cook naked 
31. do your makeup 
32. write me a note
33. have you pick out an outfit for me one day 

next month is the other 33 :) i love you 

those times

last night i was really doing some hard thinking and i realized that, the little things you may do that bug me or the times when you get really protective. its all because you love me. i just thought to myself ok, if there are people who dont care where there boyfriend or girlfriend is all the time and never know what there doing, what kind of relationship is that? like they could be off with someone else but the other person would never know. thats why i am so happy that you are like that and we tell each other where we are all the time. i mean sure there are some times where i'll be late comming home from work or maybe get distracted a bit b a nice car.lol. but i just want you to know that i will never be somewhere where you dont want me to be, or with someone else. you are just so thoughtful and caring all the time i just wanna try and be the same.
    last night i was also thinking about how you can get mad easily. but i know that its only from you having other things on your mind, like school, your drivers, your hurt arm, family stuff. anything! i just want you to know that i will think twice before i say anything when your mad or upset or sad because i know that there is usually something behind it and if lets say it is something i do. i wont fight or get defensive. im simpply going to let it go and fess up. because i know i do make mistakes and they need to be changed.  i guess what im trying to say is, all the stuff i do everything about me always is for you. i love you justin with all my heart. ♥

10 Months ♥

so today is our 10 months and i am so excited. I have never been so excited before. i just have such an amazing day planned and i cant wait to share it with the man i love. your my everything, all my hopes and all my dreams. your the one ♥ i love you justin

Halloween Outfit ;)

I LOVE YOU♥I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU♥I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU ♥ I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU ♥ I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU ♥ I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU ♥ I LOVE YOU ♥I LOVE YOU ♥

this is why..

when i say sorry all the time. there is a reason. i say sorry because i know im wrong. i know i screwed up and i know you are right. but there is another reason i say sorry so much...its because i love you, because i so afraid to lose you, thinking of life without you makes my heart hurt more than ever before, and if we would break up my heart would break. and stay broken forever. there is no one who can ever love me they way that you do and thats because you love me with everything you have. with all you are and all your soul. i love you just the same. you are my entire life. all my thoughts my notions, my dreams they go through you first. i think how will this affect us, will this be a bad idea..i always think of you. and when im without you, your still all i think about and talk about. when im with friends i always refer to you with whatever were saying, when your in class and im not. i think of you all the time. im like ok just 10 more minutes and i can see him. and when were in the halls and i dont want to look to cuddly or stuff infront of people. its because i know if we do all the time there is gonna be people who start rumors about it and i dont want the rumors to turn out like last time. i just want a happy and healthy relationship. because...you are me! its so true. i guess what im trying to say in this message is that, i know i say sorry to much and i may not show i love you sometimes but i do. i love you with all my heart, forever.

last nights event

those kissed last night. all i can say is wow. when kisses can literally make me dizzy you know you've done it right. when you told me it was cold out i figured you would go inside quickly and give me a little peck. but no. you looked deep into my eyes and just kissed me so passionatley. it was like a dream. everytime i tried to get a word in you just kept interupting me with your kisses. they were like magic! i have truley never had better kisses than those. it was so cold out and when our lips met all i felt was pure warmth all over. with your hands (well hand!) around my neck so tight, it made me feel safe. like there was no other place on earth better than right there. i think the reason why those kisses were so great was because of the talk we had before and how we turned a sad night into a fun filled night of just being together. those kisses made this night one of the best! ♥ i love you

why your the one ♥ 100 reasons

1. your you 
2. you make me feel like a princess
3. i can cry infront of you 
4. you dont judge me 
5. i can be myself around you 
6. nothing ever gets awkward between us 
7. you wanna start a family together and start planning for our future 
8. you think im beautiful 
9. the look in your eyes when you tell me you love me 
10. how you can fix almost anything 
11. when you never think anything is my fault when it clearly is 
12. our kisses we have when were stopped at red lights 
13. how amazing you car with Sierra 
14. how you can take my mood from being totally grumpy to insanely happy in no time flat
15. your my bestfriend 
16. you treat our relationship like a marriage already 
17. how you never forget our anniversary 
18. the way you hold me when were sleeping 
19. our amazing sex!!! 
20. how i know just by the look in your eyes that you wanna do it 
21. when you plan romantic evenings 
22. how you fart around me all the time but i love it cause i know your not gonna be embarrassed
23. how good you get along with my family. (especially my dad) 
24. the messages you leave me in the morning
25. how it takes atleast 10 minutes to say goodbye every night 
26. how you love my chub 
27. the times when you hold my hand in the mall and i love it cause every girl who walks by is like how did she get him :) 
28. your eyes 
29. your lips 
30. everything ! 
31. how you care so much about my life and you know exactly when something is wrong just by my attitude 
32. our long talks where i end up crying just because i am so lucky to have you 
33. how you are so stubborn and hard headed. but that makes me love you even more 

I am going to write these about once a month. 33 every time. and once i get to 99, i have a special last one :) i love you ♥

nights ..

those nights i lay awake with your smell around me but not having you there are the hardest nights i ever have to endure. not being able to sleep in your arms makes my heart hurt more than any pain can because when i lay in your arms all i imagine is how amazing this moment is, and when i wake up to see your cute face smiling while you sleep makes me the happiest girl in the world. and when were sleeping and you randomly just grab me and pull me closer without knowing your doing it shows that you do love me and you want me close to you all the time. i am so lucky i found someone to spend my life with. i could never find another person that makes me feel the way you do because you are my one and only love. you will be forever and always ♥ i love you

a little bit of love!

birthday!

so this is the hoodie my boyfriend got me for my birthday! the picture of me wouldnt upload so i found this one. it is so comfy and warm and now i feel like i am part of his family because they are all diehard fans! i hopefully will wear it to a game this season or next season in the new stadium! i love it justin thank you so much. i love you ♥

JUSTINS EYES ONLY!!!

so this post is only for justins eyes so if your reading now...STOP. but i wanna start by saying, justin i am sorry. i am sorry for being so late last night and not telling you, i am sorry for wanting to always be on top of things all the time with jobs and all. i know i cant always be like that and i am so thankful i have you to teach me how to be more laid back when i've been having to be uptight and controlling my life. i am sorry for doing things you dont want me to do. i know you know what is best for me and you do, its just my stubborn-es sometimes that controls and says "i am right i need this and maybe justins wrong this time".i mean i know you say relax for this year and i will. but i also need to be responsible too. so i have this plan out. i will not work more than 4 shifts per week. none will go past ten and if they do or i even think i will have to stay late i will make sure to call you asap. when i think something you say is wrong or maybe not the right thing for me i will tell you i think that and give you my opinion on it. because i think sometimes i can have a point with some things. but most importantly i want you to know...you are my first priority. i mean when i am at work all i think of is you. last night....i didnt go to bed the time i wanted to. i fell asleep yes. but i woke up cause i heard a car in the driveway turning around and i jumped out of bed and opened the front door to find a car driving away...justin you are my life. i know it may not seem that way all the time but you are. all i ever think about is you. all i talk about is you. when im talking to a friend all i talk about is stuff me and you have done and even if its a dumb topic all i talk about is you! i love you so very very much. you are my world. and tonight and tomorrow will be all about you! i dont give a rats ass if its my stupid birthday, i screwed up and you deserve a good day. so i am going to try and make you a nice supper. and we will do whatever you want to do. i just never want to lose you. you are my life and if i lost my life i would have nothing. i am sorry for all ive done. i love you will all my heart  can give. ♥ forever

amazing

this morning i woke up at 7:30 and had only little time to get ready. so i texted my boyfriend to beware cause i looked so bad and he said "you cant look bad, you always look great". just those little texts i get from him mean so much. he always thinks i look beautiul when i feel ugly. he thinks i am the perfect size when i could lose a few dozen pounds! hes just so wonderful and i want to let him know that those little things he tells me make my day ever time

made this for you

Heartbeat

your heartbeat, its like a siren sound. calling me to come and stay within the warmth of your soul. it tells me that i am the one, the lucky miss who gets all this. it shows me all the wonders of your heart and it tells me how to keep it safe. as i lean in to kiss your tender lips and say those three sweet words, i wait. i wait to hear the sound of my heartbeat..but i cant. i ponder, i wonder why? then i realize. its you. everything about you that makes me weak, your eyes your lips, your voice. they all make my heart stop. my heart stops to listen as it gets closer and closer to yours. its been a while and my heart still wont beat. i feel no different but all i can hear is you. your heartbeat. i finally figure. it is our hearts. they beat as one. they find a way to interlock without being within one soul. your heart tells me how we can be one. we can be so close to each other but miles apart. there is one thing that links our two hearts together. that one thing is a simple four letter word which ties all meaning of our existence together. it is called love. and it is made for us ♥

interet !

so internet crashed for a few days thats why i havent written anything. but this just means that i have lots to say. so first i wanna start out by saying, getting to spend 2 nights in a row with the love of my life was simply incredible! nothing can compare to the feeling i get when i lay beside him and see his face when i wake up! its so wonderful! also when we fall asleep all i can think of is. there is no place on thsi earth that i would rather be at that moment! nothing can live up to that! ♥ he is just so wonderful to me and he is the most important part of my life! :) he makes me who i want to be! he makes me..me! and i would rather be myself than someone im not. i am just so thankful i found someone who gets me the way he does. and understands me and why i do the things i do! also having someone who loves me so much isnt a bad perk also!

so this weekend is the long weekend and you know what that means ;) ;) hehe! but it does mean i get to spend alot of time with the man i love. i love it because were going back to school in a few days, i love it because they always bring us closer together every time, its just time that we can spend not having to do chores and not having a certain time till we can hangout! its wonderful because i always have no worries and we can just relax and lay back and have nothing on my mind except for him and how i am so lucky to call him my boyfriend. you know i consider myself insanely lucky to have found him.  before him i never got the guys i was hoping for. the ones i liked never liked me, and half the time ones i never even thought of dating would ask me out. so i dated a few lame brains. after that i was convinced that nothing would ever work for me in relationships, i would either get the ones who i never really liked or i would get one who i really liked but wanted nothing more than just a friend with benefits. but there was that night. me and my friend went to a Halloween Social just for something to do. but when i got there. i saw him. he totally blew me away it was like instant spark! his eyes! when i saw them it was as if a bolt of lightening went through my heart! i had an instant crush! so that night i tried to have fun but i just kept my eye out for the cutie! after the party was over luckly he was standing in the foyer waiting for his ride same as me...i was so wanting to talk to him but i was scared of him totally being not interested. so i just waited for my ride and admired from a far. the first thing i told my mom when she picked me up was. isnt that guy cute! and oddly enough she knew his ride! he used to work with my dad! so i did what any other girl would do....facebook search!luckly he came to the party with one of my friends so i found him easily. so i figured time to strick up a conversation. and to my surprise he was nice! he was friendly, had lots of friends who were my friends too! we talked for a few days and never ran out of subjects to talk about. so i decided to talk in person. i skipped math class so i could hang out during his spare and it was the best thing i ever did! he was so shy at first and i just couldnt stop thinking maybe this wasnt so great of an idea. but on the way back. we talked and talked and just couldnt stop! so we decided since we never had much time to talk about we would hangout for an evening just the two of us. i was insanley excited but also nervous at the same time because i had no idea if he felt the same for me.

when i think about you

when i think about you, i think about

• long talks
• laying in bed listening to your heartbeat
• your eyes which make me melt 
• your voice that sounds like heaven
• your lips so sweet 
• the way you say i love you so passionatley 
• our long talks 
• our late night food runs
• when we stay up till all hours and make love all night 
• the little messages you send me 
• our phone calls that last for hours 
• how you think im so beautiful 
• how i dont have to change for you 
• how talented you are in so many things 
• the pink flamingo you won me at the arcade
• never judgeing me 
• never falling short of my expectations 
• always wanting to be with you 24/7
• the way you are being all sexy and not even trying 
• how you can get so turned on by me in your clothes
• when we lay in bed naked and all i can feel is your warm bod against mine
• your insanley nice ass ;) 
• that time you held my shopping bags for me at the mall 
• when i think i look bad you think i look better than ever 
• the times you hold my hand in the car 
• how you always seem to put a smile on my face no matter if im sad or angry or any emotion 
• that time in the dressing room ;) 
• and in my car 
• and outside 
• and in your garage 
• and in my bathroom 
• and in your bathroom 
• and on the floor 
• when you walk in on my going to the bathroom! 
• when you try on my clothes 
• our fun times at the cabin with nick 
• your homophobia 
• how addicted you are to seeing me 
• your late night gaming sessions 
• how i can tell you anything and i dont have to be ashamed if it was embarassing

i can be who i want to be with you, i can be myself and i think that is one of the most amazing things you do for me justin. your so sweet and so easy to love i can never picture myself with anyone else. i love you baby ♥ 

so true ..

untitled

i've never felt this way before. never went through this emotion and never believed in something so much. tonight i fell asleep thinking about you and, i had a dream. and this was no ordinary dream. all i could see was you, your eyes, they looked at me so true and so loving i was in a trans. it was like no other 2 people existed in the world. i swear it was so vivid i could even smell your sweet smell that makes falling asleep beside you so wonderful. when i looked into your eyes i saw my entire time spent with you flash before my eyes. like nothing else before that even mattered. and i saw your lips. pulling me in like a siren, they were so pure and so sweet as if i could almost taste them. that taste lingers on me and keeps me longing for the next passionate kiss from you that makes me quiver.  but the last thing i saw was, your heart. i looked and i saw how you feel me, how you see me. i looked through your eyes and saw myself. and i saw a girl who has finally found the perfect lifetime partner, i saw love so intense yet so powerful like it could stop a train. it was the most unruling love that ever will be and ever has been and it will stay in that state for as long as time goes on. i love you forever

phone

so right now, at this moment i am on the phone with the most amazing boy in the world! he sounds like an angel when he speaks and i could listen to him all day long ♥

im never going to feel these words for anyone else in the world. i love you so much ♥

those sweet notes

there are many many reasons why i love my boyfriend that i will list during this blog but here is one that he does and it makes me so happy and brightens up my whole day! my boyfriend sends me notes and messages so when i wake up i get to read all the lovley things he has to say about me! its one of the greatest feelings ever to have someone who cares about me so much and just wants to be a part of everything that i do. it really is amazing. and to have a boyfriend as amazing as justin i couldnt ask for anything better. the kind words he says to me, those random hearts over text make me smile everytime. ♥ i love you

scare

so tonight i almost got into a major car accident. the first thing i could think about was justin. how i would never see him again, i would never get to hear his sweet voice, smell his skin...i was so scared and sad. once i got over my shock the firsst thing i wanted to do was drive back to his place and get wrapped up in his arms once again.. i love you so much and the thought of missing you or being without you would be more painful than anything ♥

best way to wake up ♥

so this morning i got to wake up next to the one i love. i have to say, it is probably the best feeling in the world, besides his kisses. i must say that looking over into his eyes is way better than looking over and seeing an empty bed and alarm clock. with him there is no alarm clock, i could lay in his arms forever i could look into his eyes and just melt every time because he means so much to me. and when i look over in the morning and see him there the first thing i wanna do is kiss him so soft and sweet because i know that is the best way to wake up. ♥ i love you

that sweet night

this i think is a really good reason to love my boyfriend. there was this one time that we were hanging out just a casual evening and he decides hes gonna dedicate that evening to me. so he bought me a slurpee, washed my car, payed for my gas. and i have to say that was one of the best evenings we've even had. the reason for that was because that whole evening of just being together, i really truly realized that we dont need lots of money or fancy dinners to have a good time. all we need is each others company. and i must say his company is way way better than anyone i know ♥ i love you baby

when my boyfriend kisses me goodnight i feel like im flying, he holds me so tight and with such passion it makes me feel like im the only girl in the world.

- disney movies taught me alot !

Love ♥

ok so this blog is the reasons why i love my boyfriend so very much. we just celebrated 9 months and im looking forward to many months to come. so every day until out one year i am going to post a blog either about something he did that day or in the past, a sweet quote or even a picture of us. baby this is all for you i love you with all my heart ♥